Desire

I want that PA interview so much right now!!! And the Lord knows that, because I've told him that over and over. As the days draw nearer I become more and more me-focused: googling forums to see if anyone else is receiving notifications yet, already kindling sadness and frustration in my heart because "I'm sure I didn't get in." What am I doing??!?!
I don't deserve this gift of getting into PA school.
The Lord knows all that I am thinking and feeling.
He is a whole lot bigger than me or even the MUSC admissions committee.
He delights in my happiness.
He has called me thus far and if He shuts the door now He has a reason and He will provide.

I'm saying over and over, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

Rejoice in the Lord always. Rejoice in the Lord always. Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again. . .

Oh Lord hold me tightly now. I so fear failure. I so fear being jobless and futureless. I so fear rejection. I so fear waiting. I so fear being out of control of situations. But right now I am facing those fears big time. Be my strength, my comfort, my hope, my value, and my delight!! For you are all that is good, you are all that is joy, you are all that is peace and you are all that is goodness.
Father, it seems that you have lead me down this path and opened doors to get to this point. I do desperately want to get into PA school at MUSC this year but I do lay this down at your feet. Do your will for my life, Father.